How does an East West marriage fail so quickly?
Abuse by one partner or the other?
Foolhardiness, carelessness, inconsideration by one or both partners?
Or just plain stupidity?
Whatever the reasons, the situation would have been exacerbated by the fact that many western men think, quite wrongly, that to choose a bride from where they consider an 'easy pickings' area of the world is an ideal option 'for them'.
After all, the Internet does not lie, the various message boards and dating sites giving out all that mush making it Oh, so easy…finding a life companion…Easy?…I think not!!!
The first meeting, in a kind of 'holiday mode' mentality setting…what could be easier?
We all know the longevity of most holiday romances.
Leg over…Wham Bam, thank you Ma'am. Oh, and I will marry you, just to make it regular…just like I promised…on the Internet !!!
Of course the girl will agree, all she hears about is how much better life is if she marries a westerner.
Over the fence or across the water, the grass is always so much greener…not!
No hassle, no fuss, no traditional courtship. No long drawn out 'getting to know you properly' routine. Getting to know all those little annoying details that cause the anxieties early on in any developing relationship.
But no, none of this…'Wow', you hear them say, 'I can not believe my luck', We are getting married.
Best make it quick then…before you get any older or she sees the real you !!!
All very selfish, careless and inconsiderate…no real surprise there then !
Interestingly, they, the western man would not get away with it in the west.
They would soon get short shrift from the women in their own respective countries.
It is my firm belief that it is the western man that is solely at fault, probably due to the have it now, pay later, I want, why not me?, its available, I can - modern life mentality.
All relationships need work, time, love, understanding and compromise, lots of it, in abundance, overflowing to the point of painful, never stinting and always eager to make it happen.
It must work…its my responsibility to make it work - this should be the very least of a target to set oneself as the western half of an already difficult to reconcile union.
To those that make it work and find true happiness like myself...I applaud and congratulate you.
For those that fail, I cannot empathise with you as I suspect it was your intentions and motives that were flawed from the very beginning...